Musings

Doing a sounding-it-out exercise.

Me: "What's that word?"
Frankie: "f.... a.... t..... Fff-aaa-ttt."
Me: "What does that word mean?"
Frankie: "Daddy. Daddy's fat."

On another note, today I experienced a feeling I've never had. Frankie saw a few neighborhood girls across the street playing together, one of whom she knows from a few brief interactions. They're all about 10 years old. Upon seeing them, Frankie said, "Mom, I want to go outside and play with Daniella!" Not sure how this would proceed, I said ok, provided she bundle up and not go near the street. I watched her walk outside and stand in the front yard, looking at the girls, who were pretty oblivious to the three year old peering at them. No real interaction followed, besides Frankie looking at them and wandering around the front yard. I didn't exactly want her bounding over to our neighbor's yard to play with these older girls I didn't know, but I did feel a pang realizing that every child, mine included, is bound to feel the awkwardness of being left out at some point in their lives. On paper it doesn't seem like a big deal; children need to learn to deal with disappointments, shyness, and unkind peers in a healthy way. That's life. However, seeing my own child, someone I think I know inside-out, looking somewhat bewildered because she wants to play with children who are ignoring her, gave me a sense of sadness and foreboding. Would she grow to be sociable, friendly, confident and able to make friends? How will she respond to unkind children? It struck me at that moment how beautiful it is to have multiple siblings. If life with peers outside the home isn't sunny (which happens to the best of us), what a gift to have siblings to confide in and affirm us at home.

She sauntered back inside eventually, her cheerful self, oblivious to any disappointment, much less awkwardness, that an older child might have felt (though admittedly I'd probably let an older child go across the street to introduce herself...). That's just Frankie; seldom gloomy with a quick bounce-back from all ills. She's got a good dose of sanguine, and that will always be a mystery and a joy to her melancholic mother.